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[odare]

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[abandonhumanity]

Not at all. Compared to the rest of Paradis' military, the Survey Corps was extremely small. Most people figured that choosing that regiment was as good as suicide.

Honestly, they weren't wrong.

[odare]

Were they the only ones fighting the titans?

no need to watch past 1:21 (or at all) cw: really fucked up death/grief shit if you do watch past

[abandonhumanity]

For the most part, yes. The Military Police were in charge of petty crimes within the walls, and the Garrison Regiment patrolled the perimeters, but titans tall enough to be a threat were rare until the wall was first breached. Even after that, the majority of the titans were outside of the secured walls. That was the Survey Corps' territory.

[Eren remembers being a child and watching the Scouts return from their expeditions whenever they'd pass through Shiganshina. He wanted to desperately to be one, even as he watched them march in, bloodied, defeated. They were the bravest people he could imagine. They were making a difference. They were saving the world.

[Will they still?]

damn man.

[odare]

What was your role in the military?

[abandonhumanity]

I was in the Scout Regiment. The nature of my rank was unique.

I was primarily utilized for my titan. [Ain't that puttin' it fuckin' lightly!]

[odare]

Hm... I see. Wait, what's the Scout Regiment

[abandonhumanity]

[Oh. He made that a bit confusing, he realizes.]

Sorry.

The Scout Regiment is specifically the division of the Survey Corps that ventured outside of the walls into titan territory.

Other divisions of the Survey Corps oversaw things like logistics, caring for the horses. Things like that.

[Here he is, just casually talking about his career like defecting wasn't the most difficult thing he'd ever had to do - like he was ripping 80% of his own life away. He doesn't feel perturbed, though. Talking to Finnick feels alright. He's just contented to see "odaring" keep appearing in his notifications.

[He took a seat on the couch instead of pacing a few minutes ago and didn't even notice.]

[odare]

[It's weird to read the word "sorry" from Eren, even about something small. He's pretty sure he's never heard him say that before.]

Oh, wow. A titan to fight other titans, that makes sense I guess. How did it feel?

[abandonhumanity]

How did what feel?

Fighting? Transforming?

[Being a human weapon from the age of fifteen?]

[odare]

Being used.

[abandonhumanity]

[...

[Huh. What a question.

[Even to this day, Eren doesn't tend to think of it that way; he also can't deny it. It's disquieting.]

I was proud to be.

[Used, a Scout, a monster, special.

[The void aches like an open wound.]

[odare]

I guess that makes sense. You were protecting people with your specific abilities.

[It's far from how Finnick felt about being used, but they were used for very different purposes.]

[abandonhumanity]

[It feels...like an oddly intimate confession somehow, even though it's not exactly a secret:]

I'd wanted to be a Scout since I was a child.

[Not...much more needs to be said than that, he figures. It feels self-explanatory.

[Perhaps this:] I don't regret it.

[Even given everything, it's true (after all, he never could have gotten where he is now without...)]

[odare]

It's good that you got to be what you wanted to be.

[Even if it wasn't by choice, or if that's a very violent thing to do so young and in general, it's good that Eren got something out of it.]

[abandonhumanity]

[Eren feels...entirely stunned by that answer. It's probably untrue if you're looking at things from an objective standpoint, but it makes Eren feel...

[Is "heard" the right word?

[Let him make up his own mind for once about whether or not it was his, hers, or someone's else's fault that he turned out the way he did.

[It's only ever been his. There's some freedom to that. For a while, he got to be what he wanted to be; he got to believe he was that sort of person.]

I'll pay you if you bring some of that wine to me.

[Fuck the damn wine...]

No rush. [Get your ass over here.]

[odare]

[Finnick's lips tighten into a little line.]

What makes you think you have to pay me?

[abandonhumanity]

[Eren recalls their conversation from the night before - pairs it with all he knows of Finnick and his past and - yeah. Way to go, Jaeger.]

I only meant that if you spent your credits on it, I'd give you the credits back.

I'll just come with you instead. That way I can pay myself.

[Nice...save? Eren's not great at them.]

[odare]

[Oh. Of course Eren didn't mean it... Like that.]

It's alright, I don't mind spending a few credits on something for you. You should come here though, it's almost sunset. It's nice.

cw: suicide mention

[abandonhumanity]

[Ha. Wine and a sunset. Finnick used the word "romantic". This is suicide.]

Where are you?

[odare]

I'm on the beach.

[He drops a pin of his exact location.]

I don't want to move yet, so pick up the wine on the way if you want to.

[He sends Eren the address of the little shop, too. It's down the street toward his apartment and he wants to stay on the beach. Finnick's not sure when he decided it was time to be waited on. Apparently just now. He wonders if Eren will actually do it, come to him, buy him wine.]

(text > action)

[abandonhumanity]

[Of course he's on the beach. Eren avoids it.

[He almost backs out.

[He wouldn't. Can't. Separating Finnick from the ocean would be like separating Armin from it. Impossible. It's both or nothing.]

Alright.

[Eren doesn't feel like he's waiting on Finnick (if he did, he definitely would not be coming), but he does feel somewhat pathetic hiking over to District 1 to buy wine best paired with watching a sunset.

[It's...embarrassing. And he's doing it anyway.

[He wants to see him.

[So, sure enough, he shows up as the sky starts to turn pink. Out in public, there's no chance he'll be as close to Finnick as he wants to be, but at least he'll be close.

[He finds him. Sits down next to him in the sand. He tries not to look at the water as he passes Finnick the bottle.]

I didn't bother with glasses. [He wonders if his usual dead tone will scare Finnick away now that he knows it's half bullshit. Oh well. They're not safe in his apartment anymore.]

[odare]

[Finnick smiles as Eren agrees. Perfect. The boy, the sunshine, and wine, without lifting a finger. He throws his arm over his eyes and is drifting off a little by the time Eren sits next to him. He doesn't notice until he speaks.

He moves his arm, squinting up at him and smiling. He did come, and he did bring wine.]

No need for all that fancy business.

[He props himself up to face Eren. He's shirtless, of course, with Hawaiian-ass swim shorts that are just barely dry from swimming, and a necklace of intricately woven fishing line wrapped around a light-blue piece of seaglass, which he made when he still had two hands.]

[abandonhumanity]

[Eren avoids staring at Finnick's body by focusing on his face instead, but it isn't easy - not that it's any mystery he's good-looking. Noticing it just feels a little different now. Eren's doomed either way, unfortunately; where Finnick's body isn't, his eyes are.

[He keenly remembers the feeling of Finnick's lips on his mouth - all night long, all night long.]

No one could accuse me of being that. [His voice remains dull, but at least the words are lighthearted enough (although almost everything Eren says has more than one meaning).]

[odare]

[He chuckles lightly. Finnick examines Eren a moment, noting where his gaze lands. Eren looks directly at his face; his eyes and lips. He's a little surprised Eren doesn't avoid looking at him altogether.

He sits up on his towel, shifting it 90 degrees and crossing his legs.]

Sit here.

[He pats the space on the towel next to him. People who didn't grow up around the water are funny to him. To Finnick, it's second nature not to sit directly in the sand; that's just asking for a sandy asscrack later. But not everyone knows that.

He thinks about touching him. Holding his hand, giving a little kiss. But he doesn't want to act like that's granted just because they did it once. Especially in public. Finnick's not shy at all, but Eren's another story.

Instead, he holds the bottle toward Eren.]

You're gonna make the one-armed man open this?

[He gives a small pout.]

[abandonhumanity]

[Finnick is quite literally pouting, but Eren's seen it before, and it makes him feel fond, even if he still can't quite admit it. The shuffle over to the towel is a bit awkward, and he feels stupid for sitting in the sand, but he moves over anyway, taking the bottle from Finnick. His eyes briefly go to the water. He pictures steam rising from it as if it were boiling.]

Don't look at me like that. [It's...a tease, but Eren's not sure that it will land. He's not the best at jokes these days.

[The cork is easy enough to get out. Eren opens the wine, almost passes it to Finnick, remembers that he's the one who made up the stupid excuse about wanting it in the first place, and takes a sip.

[It tastes like that night. He passes it to Finnick. Assuming he takes it, Eren lets his finger tips run briefly over Finnick's.

[That's it.]